December 2018 over-excited bride to be!!

Hi All

After playing around with a bit of a rubbish planning thread I thought I would start again!

Hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I've enjoyed reading everyone else's.

 

A BIT ABOUT US

We met way back in 2002 at a charity night in his local village hall.  I actually worked with his best mate and him and his girlfriend dragged me along.

It was fancy dress so I was attired most attractively in a naughty school girls outfit (quite appropriate really as I was only 17 at the time!) and he was dressed as one of the band members from Westlife in a red boiler suit!!  Turns out him and his mates were performing Uptown Girl as part of the performance night.  This is the two of the night we met - hideous picture really but it does make me laugh everytime I see it!!

So after a rather (very!) drunken evening we started going out, it didn't last very long though, only a few weeks as neither of us could drive at the time and we lived half an hour away from each other so was hard to get together.  I was an awful immature 17 year old and actually dumped him via text message - I cringe when I think about that now!

About 3 months after we split up I passed my driving test and the night after I actually bumped into him at a local pub. We ended up having a cheeky snog and that was that!!  He passed his test a few months later so we were able to start a proper relationship - my first and only!!

Roll on 5 years and we bought our first home together, a little one bedroom flat, and got a dog. Our first baby!!

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At this point despite only being 23 I was full of the idea of marriage and for a while that was all I thought about!  Unfortunately my other half didn't feel the same way and basically said he never wanted to get married so I had quite a few years of being jealous of all my friends getting married and just secretly hoping that one day it would happen to me!

OH and his two best mates even had a pact that they would only get married if the other two did so that they would never get married as none of them wanted to!

Cue me being rather hacked off that a few years later both of them were married & I wasn't even engaged!

As we can't seem to do things in the supposed correct order in 2012 I found out I was pregnant, took us both by surprise but was a happy surprise!  So getting engaged really did fly to the back of my mind as I had way more important things to think of.  Such as my baby girl born in October 2012. Our 'second' baby!!

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Clearly this is a recent picture!!  Not sure whether I should put pics on here or but thought I can always edit and remove!!

 

 

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Posts

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    THE PROPOSAL

    So as I said I was so tied up with our little baby the thought of marriage had pretty much left my head (I'm sure it was still there somewhere but sleepless nights and baby sick put paid to any other thoughts!!)

    One night/early hours of the morning I got back into bed after a particularly horrible night feed where I couldn't get her to go back to sleep and my OH was awake and said oh I've got something to ask to you.  I was clearly very fuzzy headed and apparently I said well can it wait until tomorrow as I want to go back to sleep!!  He said no and then asked me to marry him.  I said yes sounds great and promptly fell asleep again!!

    The next day we went ring shopping and together chose a small but perfect for me ring.

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    Cue all wedding talk then being put on hold for the next 4 years...........................................................................

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    THE SECOND 'PROPOSAL'

    So rolling on just over 4 years since he proposed and we had been so hectic with our little baby growing up, changing jobs (me), going self-employed and starting own business (him) and moving house that despite my nagging we had not got round to setting a date and I had all but given up!!

    First week of the New Year and we are sitting in our new house (moved in on Boxing Day, crazy times!!) and he randomly says shall we set a wedding date for next year then?  I nearly fell off the sofa in shock!  Then shrieked like a girl and proceeded to text all my friends & my mum and sister to shout the news out to them!

    Bless my Mum, for a couple of weeks after I would talk to her about the wedding and got a very muted response! I finally said why aren't you more excited and she said in all honestly I'm not sure you are actually going to do as you've been talking about it for so long! SO I had to show her we were serious and my planning well and truly started!!!

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    THE VENUE

    We live on the border of Hampshire & West Sussex so wanted something in that area.  I researched a few venues online but only went to visit one and I just fell in love with it straight away!!  Here it is -

    SOUTHDOWNS MANOR

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    I loved it from the start and knew I didn't want to look anywhere else.  I really didn't think it would fit into our budget but then my lovely parents offered to pay for half the venue costs so we went to an open day the week after I viewed it and got it booked.

    It's an exclusive use venue with 14 bedrooms so that guests can stay over which was one of my must haves and also you could have the ceremony and reception at the same - also a must have!

    WEDDING DATE = SUNDAY 9TH DECEMBER 2018

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    So a very very quick venue story I'm afraid, was hoping for a more exciting one to be able to tell but when somewhere seems right then it seems right!!  Here are some more pictures though.

    imageimageimageimageimageimage

    We are having 56 guests during the day including 6 children, this may go up to 60 though as my parents are trying to sneak a few extras in!!

    In the evening we are having an extra 50, am hoping the numbers will make for a good party atmosphere!!

     

  • Oooh exciting another 2018 bride! Your ring is beautiful as is the venu! 

  • Jenni8Jenni8 Posts: 3,202

    Ooooo how exciting for you after such a long wait. Your little girl is so cute!

    I am from just outside of Portsmouth so we are from a similar area, went to South Downs College. Loved South Downs Manor but it was waaay out of my budget so we are going to the New Forest to get married. I also saw your thread about  being impatient! I booked my wedding venue in Sept/Oct 2015 and my wedding is July this year so I sort of know how you feel with having to sit on my hands!

    My advice is just to do your research but don't buy/decide on anything specific as yet as the wedding industry changes so much there might be new things you prefer by the time your wedding comes around, and also you might change your tastes. Especially the dress. I bought my dress with 19 months to go and really wish I hadn't done that! I love my dress now thankfully but it almost went the other direction and I seriously started looking again as I got the dress wobbles so bad. And I am a very methodical and frugal person and defo didn't think that would happen to me!

    Book all your suppliers i.e. cake/florist as you can change your mind on the specifics of what you want closer to the wedding. Hang out here, go on pinterest, save items to wish lists online etc as this wont hurt, but try not to spend any money on anything you might change your mind on!

  • Jenni8Jenni8 Posts: 3,202

    Oh and p.s. It goes SOOO fast! It feels like yesterday that we were celebrating the year to go mark!

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    Ah thank you both!! 

    Thank you for the tips jenni, I went to southdowns college as well!! Many moons ago it feels like!! I caught up on your thread the other day, it all sounds fantastic. I love reading about other people's weddings. Think it's my guilty pleasure!! 

    I've booked my main suppliers (more on that later) and the plan is to save money as much as I can and then wait until beginning of next year before I start buying things!! 

     

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    THE THEME 

    Despite the wedding being in December I decided very quickly I didn't want a Christmas theme. The venue will have their lovely Christmas decorations up so that will be enough Christmas stuff! 

    For some reason I always wanted purple as a wedding colour, ever since school really! Helps it's my favourite colour! 

    So my heart was set on purple from the start and I decided to add silver to that and throw some bling in to make feel that extra bit special. I also love candles and lights so knew I wanted lots of those as well. Some inspiration pics below. 

    imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage

  • Jenni8Jenni8 Posts: 3,202

    Yeah isn't is scary when you think how many years it was since you were at school/college lol. I try not to! I know tell me about it - this website is a bit of a life saver. I think I'd have lost all my friends, my family wouldn't want to answer m phonecalls and I would no longer be engaged if it wasn't for you ladies always happy to hear my wedding-related ramblings! H2B knows I am on it a lot but I am not sure he quite realises how much

    Love your inspiration - especially the suits and chiffon BM dresses.

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    THE BRIDAL PARTY 

    The Girls

    So I have a younger sister who I'm really close to so she was my obvious and first choice for Maid of Honour. It was only after I asked her and then started reading these forums that I realised I could have asked her in a much more special way!! All I did was send her a Facebook message  oops!! I'll have to make it up to her! 

    I then decided that my daughter who will be 6 by the wedding and my two nieces, who will be 9 & 2.5, would be flower girls so that was nice and easy. 

    I also have 3 nephews, 9, 8 & 4, so they will be page boys. Have a rather cute idea that they could pair with the flower girls and walk down the aisle hand in hand. Whether they will go along with that remains to be seen! 

    So for a while I thought that was that. Then I started thinking of the all the things that need doing before the wedding and on the day and I wondered if 1 adult bridesmaid would be enough. My sister has 3 kids, 2 boys and a girl. The other 2 kids in the bridal party are my brother in laws. So anyway life for my sister is pretty hectic as she's a single mum and I really didn't want to put too much pressure on her. 

    So I decided to ask another friend to be a bridesmaid. She's the wife of my other half's best mate, who will be a best man, we are really good friends, she is incredibly supportive, has been so excited about the wedding and I know that she and my sister will do me proud!! As will the little ones!! 

    The Boys

    So my OH is having 2 best men, his older brother and one of his best mates. 

    Not sure if he will have ushers yet, I thought they were only really needed for a church service and ours will be a civil ceremony so I don't think there is a need for them? 

    Apparently OH has asked them both and they've said yes but I've no idea how or when he did it!! Probably just over a pint in the pub! 

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    THE PHOTOGRAPHER

    I knew pretty much straight away who I wanted to ask to do my photography.  My OH hates having his photo taken and really hates posed photos so whilst I knew I wanted photos to look back on I didn't want to spend an absolute fortune on a full blown photographer when I knew he would feel uncomfortable the whole day.

    So with this in mind I decided to ask my parents best friend who over the years has established himself as a pretty good photographer, he's won competitions etc. and I know he's not a fan of lots of posed shots and much prefers to capture natural images.

    He was really chuffed to be asked and when I bought the awkward subject of cost he wouldn't even hear of us paying him, he really wanted to do and be part of our day.  Him and his wife have been my parents best friends since I was 6 (I'm now 32) so they've been a massive part of my life anyway.

    As a thank you we will be paying for them to stay overnight at the venue in one of their suites.

    So photographer is sorted. Here are a few of my favourite photos from his website.

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  • I love it! so many photos!! 

    it looks stunning!! :)

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    HAIR AND MAKE-UP

    Something else that was fairly easy to decide on and book.

    A friend's sister is doing my hair, plus my 2 bridesmaids and 2 flower girls and my mum! I known her for a few years and she has put my hair up for special occasions before.

    She also did 2 of my best friends wedding hair a few years ago and one I was a bridesmaid at so I knew we would be in safe hands!!

    Couple of pics of how I would ideally like my hair.

    imageimageimage

    It's got to grow a fair bit first as it doesn't even reach my shoulders at the moment! Am hoping 21 months is enough time!!

     

    For my make-up I don't have any thoughts about how I would like it yet but I was definitely adamant about having it done! I don't wear much make up normally and that's mainly due to time in the mornings and also the fact I am pretty useless at putting it on!

    I'm not a girly girl really, I love football and trainers and cider!! but I know I would wear more makeup if I knew how to apply it better!

    I thought it would also be nice to treat my 2 bridesmaids and my mum to have their make up done as well. I had no initial thoughts on who to get to do it, thought I would just do some google searches and get some recommendations.

    However browsing through Facebook one day I see a Facebook friend of mine had been tagged in a wedding post about make up so as I am very nosy I decided to investigate!

    Turns out a girl I used to work a good few years ago now when we were both Personal Trainers had retrained as a beauty therapist and make-up artist.  Looking through her portfolio the pictures were fantastic so straight away I messaged her.

    We don't really speak much anymore as no longer work together and just drifted apart so I felt a bit bad just messaging her out of blue.  She was lovely though and really pleased to hear from me, a few messages later we had it booked in and bless she gave me a discount as well.  Happy days!!!

     

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride
    FutureMrsEllis wrote (see post):

    I love it! so many photos!! 

    it looks stunning!! :)

     

    Thank you! I do love pictures!! Was hoping to transfer my Pinterest boards onto here but can't figure out how to do it! So most of the pictures are from Facebook or google images!!

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    FLOWERS

    The florist is my most recent booking.  The first few weeks of planning I was adamant I wasn't going to spend money on flowers as they die - me being nice and morbid here!  Some of my recently married friends had said they spent up to £1k on flowers which there was no way I was going to do.

    I kept seeing silk and foam flowers pop up on Facebook and Ebay and I thought they looked really nice so I investigated a few companies and got a quote of £250 for a brides teardrop bouquet, 5 bridesmaid/flower girls bouquets, 5 buttonholes and a top table arrangement so I was feeling very pleased with that bargain price!

    I hadn't booked anything so far and then when my Mum was round talk invariably turned to the wedding and my Mum said have you looked at florists yet.  So I started telling her and my OH about my bargain foam flower find and they both looked at me like I'd grown another head!

    Apparently there is no way I can have foam flowers at my wedding! My OH is a gardener so he thinks he's an expert in this particular field, it was the first time he had really expressed a strong opinion about anything to do with the wedding really so I thought I should maybe listen as he obviously felt quite strongly about it!

    My Mum totally sided with my OH on this subject and they said we would work fresh flowers into the budget!

    So I began a florist search........................

    & it quickly ended!!!  A friend of mine recently got married at the same venue as I will be and she started uploading some of her wedding pics, she left some very good comments about her florist so I began my search with them.

    My Mum and I went to visit them, Global Flowers in Midhurst, West Sussex, one Sunday and had a talk about colours, what we wanted, types of flowers etc. and a couple of days later I received her quote -

    A bridal shower bouquet, 2 bridesmaids and 3 flower girls bouquets, 5 buttonholes, 2 corsages (for the mums), 3 thank you bouquets and an arrangement to go on the ceremony table and then to be moved to the top table for an unbelievably amazing price of £364!!

    I was totally blown away. It helps I'm not having anything too extravagant, my bouquet will be made up of Lisianthus, roses, and freesias with diamantes in the centre of the roses and the bridesmaids bouquets will be made of ivory roses with diamantes in the centre and then tied compactly with a purple ribbon and the buttonholes and corsages are fairly simple as well but I'm so pleased with the price so got it booked straight away. 

    Some pics of what they might look like

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  • Wow those flower ideas look amazing and the price is fantastic! I've not even started looking at florists yet don't know where to start tbh! 

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride
    AlmosttMrsL wrote (see post):

    Wow those flower ideas look amazing and the price is fantastic! I've not even started looking at florists yet don't know where to start tbh! 

     

    I would start by asking any recently married friends if they have any recommendations and then just a simple google or Facebook search will throw up a few options. Look at their photos and reviews.

     

  • It's all shaping up beautifully Kelly - how exciting! That shade of purple is stunning.

    Loved your getting together story. It's nice to see how many brides on here have been with their H2Bs for years before tying the knot. Often feels like everyone I know gets engaged after just a year of 'courting' - aisle races.

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    ENTERTAINMENT

    So I'm only thinking about entertainment for the evening, we only have a small gap of 60-90 minutes in between our ceremony and wedding breakfast so I'm hoping everyone can amuse themselves with the bar and canapés during this time!

    I do have a couple of debates for evening entertainment though -

    PHOTOBOOTH OR MAGIC MIRROR

    Bit of a silly one really, I definitely want one or the other. I do love a good photobooth but the mirror is a bit newer and quirkier so I'm edging towards that! I've contacted our venues preferred supplier and they've quoted £450 for either for 4 hours with props, guest book, attendant etc.  Seems quite an average price and I like the fact they know the venue etc. so will definitely be booking them at some point.  Whether it's the booth or mirror remains to be seen!!

    DJ OR BAND OR BOTH??

    I booked our DJ pretty much straight away as he's a friend of my OH's.  Thought that was it, all sorted!

    Then my Dad pipes up with should we get a band?

    My parents (bless them!) love to throw a party and they just want everyone to have a really good time & my Dad thinks a band will provide a great atmosphere.

    I do agree with this but a band wasn't in my budget at all.  So my Dad said he would pay for the band, very lovely of him! Now I don't know whether we need the DJ as well?

    Has anyone got any thoughts on this? The band provide an ipod to play in their breaks and that the end of the evening as they have to finish at 11pm but non-live music can go on until midnight.

    I just think an Ipod won't be as entertaining as a DJ.  The band have 2 1 hour sets so I think we'll need music for about an hour before, half an hour inbetween their sets and an hour at the end. Our DJ is doing us a good price so I'm tempted to have both.

    We've found a couple of bands like we like the sound of so far.  My Dad has his heart set on one called Soul Patrol and thinks we should just book them as he doesn't want to listen to too many and get mixed up! My Mum on the other hand thinks we should do lots of research! I'm leaving the two of them to argue amongst themselves about that one!!

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride
    Rosegold017 wrote (see post):

    It's all shaping up beautifully Kelly - how exciting! That shade of purple is stunning.

    Loved your getting together story. It's nice to see how many brides on here have been with their H2Bs for years before tying the knot. Often feels like everyone I know gets engaged after just a year of 'courting' - aisle races.

     

    Thank you, I do love purple!!  Although did have a wobble just last week and wondered if I should change the whole colour scheme to rose gold. My OH actually put forward his opinion and said he preferred purple so luckily I stuck to it.

    My OH is so laidback that I'm not surprised it's taken us this long to get round to it!!  Will be worth it in the end though and I love the fact that our daughter is going to be so involved in everything,

     

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    GETTING 'WEDDING READY'

    So clearly I have a long time to go before the big day - 653 days to be exact!!!

    but one thing that has been playing on my mind recently is my weight.  I'm not massive by any stretch but I'm the heaviest I've ever been (except for when pregnant & that doesn't count!) and I have lots of wobbly bits (stomach, arms etc) that I would really like to tone up in time. 

    I've tried various quick diets in the past like Juice Plus and Slim Fast but as I've still got ages to go I wanted to do it nice and slowly.  I tried Slimming World last year but was rubbish at it, I think because I had nothing to really motivate me.  So what could be more motivating than your own wedding and trying on those gorgeous dresses??

    So last night I took the plunge and joined Slimming World again with my bridesmaid A, she only wants to lose 9lbs!! Jealous!!  The scales were definitely the heaviest they've been and probably half a stone heavier than since I was last at Slimming World which was a bit of a shock!

    I've set myself an initial target of 2 stone and then I'll see how I look/feel when I get there.  I can't remember the last time I was that weight so no idea what I will look like!

    My first aim is to lose a stone by October to go dress shopping!!  I really want to go straight away but have been advised by other brides on here not to make the decision too quickly! So October will be a good starting point as will aim to order it by beginning of 2018 so that gives me a few months of shopping!!  I also want to look and feel a bit better before I have to strip in front of (normally skinny) bridal consultants and I don't want to try on my dream dress and feel like a dumpling in it!!

    That's the plan anyway! We'll see how it goes!!  Bring on the fruit and veg.  Bye bye chocolate and crisps

  • August18August18 Posts: 247

    wow you are super organised im jealous and if my partner read this he would be to .. he is very organised and im not.. if it was down to just me i think ive still be deciding on a venue! 

     

    you've nailed the theme looks so lovely! i love the way it all blends.

     

    xx

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    Anyone else had any issues booking their ceremony??  it's driving me a bit bonkers!

    It's the only main thing left to book (really should have been the first!) but as it's a civil ceremony it has to be done by Chichester Council so had a look online when I booked the venue to find out that first of all it's a cost of £552!!  How much?? & second of all you have to pay for it all at once - no deposit etc.  We had already paid a massive deposit to secure the venue so just couldn't afford another big outlay straight away.

    So today I'm finally calling to book the ceremony - fingers crossed they will still have a decent time left!  So firstly tried calling the council, the registration team take all my details, name, date, venue, partners name, address etc. and then put me through to the ceremonies team - no answer!!  So I have to wait for a call back.  Am at work so phone is on silent & they call back when I'm in a meeting - grrr!!!  so call them back, I then have to give the same details to another person and then they tried again to put me through to the ceremonies team and again no answer!!!  So I've got to wait for another call back.

    I just want it sorted as I have the money to pay for it and I'm becoming increasingly paranoid that they wont have the time I want or even worse that they are booked up.  I don't know how likely that is as we are talking end of next year but still I won't relax until I know it's done!

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride
    August18 wrote (see post):

    wow you are super organised im jealous and if my partner read this he would be to .. he is very organised and im not.. if it was down to just me i think ive still be deciding on a venue! 

     

    you've nailed the theme looks so lovely! i love the way it all blends.

     

    xx

     

    Thanks August18 I've been a bit quick to sort most things out so now I'm going to be a bit lost as I've agreed not to book anything else this year and just save money!

    Will just be exploring my theme and deciding on decorations for the next few months I think!

    Going to an open evening at my venue tomorrow night with my Mum & MIL so we can look at the space again and see what areas we need to decorate.  Really excited about seeing it again.

    How are your plans going?

     

  • Jenni8Jenni8 Posts: 3,202

    Kelly is it Hampshire Registrars? If so, we booked with a £60 deposit and the remainder payable 3 months before the day (1 month away now aaah!). But yeah it is £560 ish! Crazy how much they can charge but it is a pretty essential part of getting married (!) and as it is a public sector service there isn't any competition! Unless you go down the humanist/celebrant route, but you still need to pay the registrars to get legally wed.

    Plus don't forget it is another £35 each to give notice too!

  • August18August18 Posts: 247
    Kelly224 wrote (see post):
    August18 wrote (see post):

    wow you are super organised im jealous and if my partner read this he would be to .. he is very organised and im not.. if it was down to just me i think ive still be deciding on a venue! 

     

    you've nailed the theme looks so lovely! i love the way it all blends.

     

    xx

     

    Thanks August18 I've been a bit quick to sort most things out so now I'm going to be a bit lost as I've agreed not to book anything else this year and just save money!

    Will just be exploring my theme and deciding on decorations for the next few months I think!

    Going to an open evening at my venue tomorrow night with my Mum & MIL so we can look at the space again and see what areas we need to decorate.  Really excited about seeing it again.

    How are your plans going?

     

    Not so bad (thanks to my partner) weve booked registrar ( crazy money) venue(although we went with a different choice to the one we wanted), dj, videographer and think weve found our photographer.we did have the bridesmaid dresses but they're all going to have to go back as my sister changed her mind and i also thought id found my dress but got cold feet and have gone back to the drawing board! 

     

    xx

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    Jenni8 I'm so annoyed about this but even though technically the venue is in Hampshire it has to be done through Chichester Council!!  I saw that Hampshire council only make you pay a deposit which is why I was so shocked and annoyed that I had to pay the full amount upfront for Chichester.  I don't know why it can only be done through one council?

    3 more phone calls later at work and I still haven't managed to get through to the ceremonies team - getting v frustrated now!  I'm so worried that when I finally get through i'll be told either fully booked or only 11am available!  No idea what I will do if that happens! 

  • Kelly224Kelly224 Posts: 962 New bride

    Woohoo!!!  Phoned the ceremonies team as soon as they were open this morning and so pleased that had my ideal time available.

    So wedding is booked for 2.30pm on Sunday 9th December 2018.

    That's my last main thing booked so now it's just save, save, save, Pinterest, Pinterest, Pinterest for the rest of the year!! (not allowing myself to buy anything else until next year now!!)

  • SammykateSammykate Posts: 3,360 New bride

    Oh you're getting married on my birthday! Good choice haha. I agree registrars are annoying, and they are all a law onto themselves!! Some let you reserve a date years in advance, some take a deposit, some don't, it's just pot luck. The costs seem random too- ours was £30 to reserve a date, £10 just to book an appointment to give notice, and £35 each to give notice. Then the ceremony was £540... but if it was on a Saturday it would have been £400something! It's like they just make it up as they go. So our ceremony has ended up costing £640 in all. And it's not like you can shop around and get it cheaper lol.

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