Forum home Your planning threads

Just eighteen weeks to plan my wedding!

We got engaged on June 1st and have booked to get married on October 7th - just 18 weeks away.

Of course, that doesn't mean I haven't been thinking about the wedding for a little while ... I knew a proposal was coming, just not sure when!

But now it's 'official', I can start browsing, booking and buying in earnest!

We have a small budget, under 5k,  I've a lot to pack in to the next 18 weeks - one advantage is, I suppose, I won't be able to change my mind like I would if I had more time!

Like so many brides-to-be, I thought I'd write a planning thread to get my thoughts together, share ideas, and, no doubt, ask for a lot of advice!

So, with my head full of ideas, and still excited following the proposal - let the planning begin!

«13456714

Posts

  • Wibs77Wibs77 Posts: 414

    Congratulations I am on similar timelines as you! So much to do so little time! 

  • Futuremrsb95Futuremrsb95 Posts: 425

    We re date twins with a similar budget although had a lot more planning time, best of luck :) 

  • Katherine66Katherine66 Posts: 1,234

    This may seem like a small amount of time but i remember my mum planning my sisters wedding after she fell pregnant before marriage!  

    Its perfectly doable and alot of fun everything happens at once!  Good luck with it xxx

  • Mrs_BadgerMrs_Badger Posts: 1,441 New bride

    Big congratulations!!!! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃

  • MrsLMTMrsLMT Posts: 3,830

    Congratulations x 

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Thank you Wibs77!  A short timeline makes you really focus!  I'm not great at snap decisions, and I htink because of the sort lead time I'll need to make some compromises, but it's exciting!  Have you got a planning thread?

    Thank you, Futuremrsb95 - a date twin :) how's your planning coming along?

    Katharine66 - back in the day people used to plan their weddings in a short time too - must be do-able, and you're right, tricky but lots of fun (I hope!)

    Thank you Badgersbetty!!!

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    A little bit of background ...

    We met for the first time in 1977 at a school dance when I was 15 and he was 17.

    Unfortunately, it was the only time I was to see him for another 38 years ... we arranged to meet the following Sunday in the park for a walk, but due to family circumstances, I wasn't allowed to go.  Of course, in those days, there were no mobile phones - I didn't know where he lived either, and so I had no option but to 'stand him up'.

    I felt absolutely dreadful.

    I'd never let anyone down in this way, and I had very low self-esteem myself, and felt very distressed that I was making someone else  feel insignificant and unvalued.  None of my friends knew him or where he lived, and after some limited enquiries that got me nowhere, I had to give up trying to contact him.

    But the feeling I'd potentially hurt someone and never explained why stuck with me through the years.  When my children were growing up, we'd talk about 'things we regretted' and letting him down was the thing I always mentioned.  The story, such as it was, was a good lesson for my children - how you should never let people down, how you should consider their feelings and what effect your actions might have on a person and the way they feel about themselves, and how sometimes we don't get the chance to make things right.

    Years later the internet was invented.  I looked for him on Friends Reunited but didn't see him.  Then one day, in 2013, I found him on Facebook!

    I sent him a message, saying he wouldn't remember me, but I remembered him, and it was good to see him looking happy on Facebook, and I didn't want to bother him, but I wanted to explain why I let him down all those years ago, and how awful I'd felt about it through the years.  I wished him all the best with the rest of his life.

    After pressing 'send' I felt such a sense of relief.  I told my daughter about it and she was so pleased I'd managed to contact him after all that time.

    Even when I didn't hear back, I felt a weight was lifted from my shoulders.

    I was newly married, and looking forward to life!

     

  • Laura349Laura349 Posts: 1,001 New bride

    Congratulations! That is such a lovely story of how you met/re-met! 

    I have a similar budget to you but have 17 months to plan! (although I am very tempted to move our date to this year - as myself and h2b are both impatient!) 

    Best of luck with all the planning and I'm sure we will help you out with any questions! x

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Unfortunately, my new marriage didn't work out well.

    I don't want to go in to details really.  I tried very hard to make it right.  By the end of 2014 I was as miserable as I had ever been, my husband listened to my concerns and ideas to make things better, but said he couldn't see my problem - that everything was fine as far as he was concerned, and that there was something wrong with me.

    After while, he didn't even listen.

    One day in 2015 I got a message from h2b.

    He hadn't forgotten me. We 'talked' regularly  because of our mutual love of music and shared interest in the town we grew up in. He was a fantastic support about my failing, difficult marriage.

    When my husband left later that year h2b was a good friend to me. 

    I'd had enough of men - of people! - but he restored my faith and by the end of the year we were together.  It all happened quite quickly - but, being older, we are acutely aware that life is very short, and chances of happiness should be grabbed and cherished.

    And that brings us to now - we haven't long to plan the wedding, but it's getting married that counts.

    As the famous quote from 'When Harry Met Sally' says, 

    'When you realise you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible'

     

     

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Thank you Laura 349!

    I know what you mean about bringing it forward - I'm impatient too!

    We know we won't get 'everything we want' by having a smaller budget and short timescale, but actually 'what we want' is to get married and celebrate with the friends who supported us through tricky times.

    Although I want it to be pretty and fun for our guests, I can 'lose' the 'extras' - or most of them anyway!  Having said that, I probably need to avoid Pinterest - so many gorgeous ideas on there...!

  • MissDizzleMissDizzle Posts: 56 New bride

    Ooh you should put that quote on your invites/save The dates. It made me tingle.

    so glad you've finally re found it each other. Looking forward to reading along with your planning 

  • Laura349Laura349 Posts: 1,001 New bride
    Epiphany wrote (see post):

    Thank you Laura 349!

    I know what you mean about bringing it forward - I'm impatient too!

    We know we won't get 'everything we want' by having a smaller budget and short timescale, but actually 'what we want' is to get married and celebrate with the friends who supported us through tricky times.

    Although I want it to be pretty and fun for our guests, I can 'lose' the 'extras' - or most of them anyway!  Having said that, I probably need to avoid Pinterest - so many gorgeous ideas on there...!

    I agree about Pinterest! The things on there are lovely! As for the 'When Harry Met Sally' Quote I completely agree! We've planned to get married on 5/11/2018! But i'm SO tempted to bring it forward a year! 

  • MrsLMTMrsLMT Posts: 3,830

    Aww I love the quote. Gave me goosebumps x

  • Katherine66Katherine66 Posts: 1,234

    Epiphany- yes my sis was married late 1970s.  Mind you my own first wedding in1987 it took me  9 months!   Mum and dad did everything back then of course all i did was make a cushion haaa!:)

  • Futuremrsb95Futuremrsb95 Posts: 425
    Epiphany wrote (see post):

    Thank you Wibs77!  A short timeline makes you really focus!  I'm not great at snap decisions, and I htink because of the sort lead time I'll need to make some compromises, but it's exciting!  Have you got a planning thread?

    Thank you, Futuremrsb95 - a date twin :) how's your planning coming along?

     

    not much left to do now, just some smaller details and planning a hen party :) 

     

  • RosieC18RosieC18 Posts: 158

    Many congratulations, Epiphany! What a wonderful story. 

    Although you've got a tight timescale, it may actually help with your budget. I found lots of venues offered 'last minute' deals. You may be able to negotiate some of your extras with venues & suppliers who otherwise wouldn't have any business on your chosen date. 

    Good luck! Looking forward to hearing how the next eighteen weeks pan out for you & your H2B xoxo

  • Tanya128Tanya128 Posts: 1,993

    Yes Pinterest should be avoided  it's what got me into the whole hammering tincans for weeks on end, not something I'd recommend even if it is free decoration for the low budget bride!

  • SpacepuffinSpacepuffin Posts: 664 New bride
    Tanya128 wrote (see post):

    Yes Pinterest should be avoided  it's what got me into the whole hammering tincans for weeks on end, not something I'd recommend even if it is free decoration for the low budget bride!

     

    Hahahaha! They'll be fantastic though and you'll soon forget the thumb blisters. X

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Dizzle - I like your idea of putting that quote on the invitations ... even if I don't put it there, it could go on the Order of Service sheet or something?

    Laura 349 - go for it!  What are you waiting for?!  (I know, it's easier to budget and plan and get everything you want if you wait, totally understand!)

    Future Mrs Thomas - it's a lovely quote, and has been 'our' quote when we've been thinking about the future - we have sadly lost many friends and relatives at the age we are now and younger, and want to make the most of life.

    Katherine66 - my first marriage was in 1985 - took 6 months to plan - well, we booked the church and venue 6 months beforehand, I rang a florist three weeks before (couldn't find one earlier as i was working in a different town and didn't have my home town's 'Yellow Pages' to look up florists!)  How times change!  We went to Laura Ashley to pick two bridesmaid dresses which I bought without them trying on, just posted them to the girls!  My dress was made by a friend of my mum's!  People brought their own confetti - the brightly coloured tissue paper kind. Different world now!

    Future Mrsb95 - you are WAY ahead of me!

    Rosie - good point, thank you!  Also I'm hoping October isn't so 'high season' maybe?  So easier to 'sneak in' with suppliers, 

    Tanya and Spacepuffin - they sound hard work, but worth it - did you make lots of mistakes though Tanya and 'waste' some tins?  I've started saving glass jars, but getting the bloomin labels off is a nightmare!

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Flowersimage

    Although I'm budget-conscious, I really love fresh flowers, and have been thinking about my bouquet.  I can't afford lots of flowers at the venue/church, but I'd like to have a good, large bouquet as it will be in lots of the photos - and give me something to carry and take my mind off what to do with my hands!  I'm far from being a petite bride - I'm 5'9" in my stocking feet, and broad shouldered (and rather chubby too) so a small posy wouldn't suffice really...

    Also, although it is an October wedding, I'm not in to the autumn colours particularly.  I've seen some super golds and oranges on Pinterest, and lovely reds and coppers, but it just isn't me really - think I'm more of a blue person!

    These are some of the flowers I like (you see?  I've been on Pinterest even when I shouldn't have been!)

    image

    image

    image

    image

    I think there is a blue hydrangea theme going on here!  I love the soft blue against the pinky colour - would you say it's a sort of blush pink or baby pink perhaps?

    I also think that blue hydrangeas are available in October - also roses, but no peonies, although David Austin roses are very peony-like.

     

     

  • wed172Bwed172B Posts: 1,258

    I love the dusky pink ( almost peachy) colour against the blue it's lovely

  • Laura349Laura349 Posts: 1,001 New bride

    The flower ideas look lovely! We've gone foe a orange / red rose bouquet (as we're getting married in November so using autumn colours!) I'm also attempting to make my own bouquets! It's cost me £24 for the roses from eBay so fingers crossed they'll look good! lol. 

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Thank you wed172B - it breaks the blue up a little doesn't it?

    Oooh Laura, that sounds like a terrific bargain, and if you make your own you are in control completely ... not sure I'm talented enough and I do love fresh flowers.  How many bouquets are you making?  Will you make buttonholes too?

  • Mrs_BadgerMrs_Badger Posts: 1,441 New bride

    This is my favourite 

  • Tanya128Tanya128 Posts: 1,993

    I didn't really waste any tins, I lost about 4 I think in the freezer, bizarrely they split during freezing, but I'd made templates to put marks on with a felt pen and they disappear when you hammer the hole in with the nail.

    It's more of a blush peach pink rather than baby pink I think. Love the last photo think that's really pretty.

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    Badgersbetty, I can't open the picture you posted! :(

    Thanks Tanya - how many tins did you make?  Wondering if they'd look pretty outside in the evening as it's an October wedding .... well, I know they would look pretty, it's just whether I have the time!  I'm collecting jam jars to put ribbon around to hold flowers, maybe tin cans as well is too much ... the house would look like a recycling yard (even more than it does now sometimes!)

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    The Venue

    Today I have sent the deposit in to the venue!

    Originally, to save  money, we thought we'd use the village hall.  Unfortunately the hall isn't in the best condition and when we looked at it more closely we realised we would have to hire chairs and possibly tables too.  There are plates and things, and cutlery, but they aren't suitable really, quite a mismatched lot, but not in a good way!

    I looked online at hire companies and got some quotes and for tables, chairs, plates and cutlery for 80 people it would be £1500.

    Because of the condition of the walls, I would want to hire bunting too, or make some ribbon bunting.

    We've had to think about numbers as well - 90 on our list, but if we'd had the hall, we'd've invited them all along for the whole day ... we thought about it and decided that maybe we could have 60 for the day and add 'the other 30' for the evening ...

    Anyway, after a lot of deliberation, we went to see a cafe/shop/restaurant we like, and we have decided on an afternoon tea for about 60 and then pizzas in the venue's outdoor pizza oven in the evening - because the pizza option is a flat rate regardless of the number of guests you have ...

    This is the venue!

    image

    They charge £10 a head for afternoon tea (plus VAT) and there is a space for a band to play - although we think we'll have a band we know, plus some 'open mic' type music as lots of our friends are amateur performers.  I think I've got a photo of the corner for the musicians ... and there should be space for a bit of dancing too.

    image

  • EpiphanyEpiphany Posts: 718

    I have found some pictures on the internet of the venue set up for a wedding.image

    Although I think I'd have the tables pushed into 'tables' or 'squares' if you like rather than rows - I think that may be more sociable?  Not sure though!

    image

    image

    And the above picture shows it from the outside.  I like the fact there is a lot of parking as we have guest travelling from all over the country.  The only difficulty is that it is 8 miles from the nearest station, and so that means guests really have to come by car, which may limit what they drink ... do you think that will limit their enjoyment?

  • Laura349Laura349 Posts: 1,001 New bride

    The venue looks lovely! Very rustic :) I'm loving your planning thread so far! I just seemed to waffle a bit on mine! haha

  • Stunning venue! I would so book that. And the pizza oven sounds great.

    I like the last bouquet picture too. Blu hydrangeas are lovely.

Sign In or Register to comment.