Winter Wonderful - Dec 2019 (the higgledy piggledy thread edited!)

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  • MrsGtoBMrsGtoB Posts: 712 New bride

    How exciting that you nearly have a decision on venue.  Maybe get some quotes from venue dressers so you can look at the overall cost comparison as these things do add up quickly.

    I'll just add in here that I am also and 'older' bride at 38 and totally get what you say about looking at sites and thinking I'm not cool enough.  We got knocked back by two videographers for not meeting their requirements (well one I didn't send too as I though I'm not explaining who I am and being judged).  

    I still haven't made it to Alty market yet, we went to Mackie Mayor the other week though and loved it.

    x

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,914 New bride

    We are getting married in a pub and no one has told us we are weird or cheap yet 😂 We also agreed we'd feel silly fannying about in a stately home/castle, we're very down to earth people and we'll feel much more comfortable in the pub.

    Seriously though, that is a fantastic deal price wise, I'd bite their hand off!

  • I really wouldn't worry about doubting your decision, we were so torn between two and we actually went with h2b's favourite, I was so worried about regretting it but haven't given the other venue a thought since. I think once you make a decision you'll forget about the others. 

  • Zara29Zara29 Posts: 105

    As a guest I'd be keen to go to a pub too! Nice to go somewhere different and possibly a little more relaxed.

  • So I went ahead and booked The Plough today. 

    whoooooo, we have a venue and a date - 22nd December 2019. 

    I had exact ten minutes lunch break today to phone them, cram a sandwich in my mouth and try and fit a wee in somewhere but still felt compelled to get it booked there and then. I’m sure it would have been fine to wait till after we’d seen the other venues at the weekend, but we’d pretty much decided and this morning I just woke up with the feeling I had to get it booked. Registrar tomorrow! 

    It feels a bit surreal, I still wonder if x/y/z would have been better but when we came out of The Plough on Sunday and they didn’t have our October date which I thought meant we couldn’t have it there, I cried. I’ve been really attracted and loved the idea of all the venues we’ve seen for different reasons, but I was super invested in The Plough and it just feels right. 

    Reading reviews from people who got married there and they’re super positive which is really nice too. I can’t get over how good the deal is, I‘m so ready for a catch! 

    22nd December - are we insane? 

    Very probably! But the people I simply couldn’t get married without (sisters, nieces and nephews, aunt, best friends, R’s parents) are all ok with it, so even if no one else comes it’ll be wonderful. 

    But hey, remember the title of the thread? Of course it’s still a bit higgledy, because we have our fertility appointment in a week and a half, so we will wait to book any other suppliers or do save the dates etc, probably till Jan, just till we know if they’re going to offer any treatment and what form that may take. Our deposit with The Plough is transferable to another date if needs be, I think up until about 4 months before, so we’re going to hold our horses before paying anything that isn’t flexible (apart from the registrar who we‘ll pay the initial deposit for). 

    It‘s so weird because for over 2 years I’ve wanted nothing more than to get pregnant (I mean I’ve wanted it for about 5 years really, but 2 and a bit of active trying) and now I’m thinking ‘well it would be ok if I got pregnant in this month but not in that month’ which is INSANE because any time I got pregnant would be a freaking overwhelming miracle and I’d be over the moon. But for the first time in a long time there’s a competing priority. Still, we will see how it all pans out. 

     

  • MrsGtoB wrote (see post):

    How exciting that you nearly have a decision on venue.  Maybe get some quotes from venue dressers so you can look at the overall cost comparison as these things do add up quickly.

    I'll just add in here that I am also and 'older' bride at 38 and totally get what you say about looking at sites and thinking I'm not cool enough.  We got knocked back by two videographers for not meeting their requirements (well one I didn't send too as I though I'm not explaining who I am and being judged).  

    I still haven't made it to Alty market yet, we went to Mackie Mayor the other week though and loved it.

    x

     

    I can’t believe that you have to meet ‘requirements‘ for people to agree to let you pay them lots of money. Insane! 

    I love what the market/general redevelopment has done for Altrincham but I can never get a bloody seat when we go so I rarely attempt it these days. I’d never even heard of Mackie Mayor but looked it up, definitely going to try it. 

  • Woo hoo for a venue and a date!

    You'll probably have a case of the "what if"s for a few weeks, but it should fade once you start doing a bit more planning and booking of other things too. Mine did. Now I'm just excited!

    And I don't think 22nd December is mad at all. I was gunning for a Christmas wedding originally. As long as you get save the dates and/or invites out in good time, people can plan their party season accordingly and make sure they save some of their livers for you!

  • Ashley72Ashley72 Posts: 1,137 New bride

    So exciting to have a venue and date! I think when you just can’t shake somewhere sometimes it’s meant to be. It sounds like it makes so much sense too financially and you’ll be able to have a few more personal touches / frills because it’s less expensive than some of the others. I actually think it’s nice to have a date so close to Christmas! Gives people the excuse to start their Christmas holiday early and will always be a magical time of the year to celebrate your anniversaries.

  • GinAndBlingGinAndBling Posts: 1,310 New bride

    Amazing- bet it feels good to have that sorted! looks like a lovely venue too. Fingers crossed for your fertility treatments xx

    Our planning thread: We're completely winging it.
    Our report: A fun, classic May day in navy and blush
    My weightloss thread: Diet denial! 
  • Booked the registrar today as well, and now I will have to sit on my hands for a bit until we know what’s happening with project baby! 

    Im wondering if I should have another planning thread and delete this one which is essentially me boring on about venues for ages! So now I can call it something suitably festive! But Im not sure I can be bothered, I wish I could just change the title. 

    My niece (age 19) has agreed to play guitar and sing for my entrance, and possibly during signing the register, which has made me so so happy. She’s so talented but gets so nervous, so I think we’ll also get her to record it so if she really doesn’t feel up to it on the day we can use the recording. 

    My other niece, the above’s sister, is a hairdresser and is going to do my hair. 

    My sister in law also offered today to help with flowers, MIL is also ‘on’ flowers - MIL did the church flowers for years, SIL went on a flower arranging course and did all the flowers for her son’s wedding - they were lovely - so we should be covered there. 

    I‘ve ordered a mini chalkboard sign on a ribbon from the works. My plan is to write the save the date on it and put it round Fred’s neck then take a photo, then use an offer code for some free prints and use the photos as save the dates - like this .....

    image

    image

    God knows how it will turn out, Fred’s only little and he’s an uncooperative bugger when he wants to be so it’ll probably be a disaster but if it works it’ll be cute. 

    I might do a wedding website as well, need to look into that, have other people bothered? Who did you use if so? 

  • Candice9Candice9 Posts: 230 New bride

    Those dog signs are so cute!!

    Don't delete your thread, I have loved it! We used getting married for our website (adamandcandy.gettingmarried.co.uk If you want a nosy), really easy to do and a great way to get all your info together!

  • What a cute idea!! I think thatll work really well, and for cheap prints download Snapfish & FreePrints, you get about 40 free prints each a month, just pay postage! 
    I know what you mean about the new thread, i felt the same for a while because i started mine before we had a venue and date, but im less bothered now. 
    Weve also used Getting Married, we havent done much other than make an account yet but seems really easy to use. 

  • MrsCToBeeMrsCToBee Posts: 2,914 New bride

    So glad to see you have your venue booked, congrats! Love the Save The Date idea also 😀

  • I have just bought a wowcher for a set of 36 photo magnets, I got the 7cm square ones, and it was £9.99 - so if my plan works I’ll get the save the date/Freddie picture printed onto them and see how they turn out. If I can’t get a decent picture of him I’ll use the deal to print some other pictures onto magnets, or I’m sure I can think of some uses for school if nothing else! 

    I‘ll give out as many as possible and stick the others in with Christmas cards so I don’t have to buy extra envelopes etc. Though may have to pay extra for postage, I’m not sure how substantial  the magnets are! 

  • Love the save the date idea! 

    I completely understand with the thread, I did the same and my title says summer 2019 when it's actually more autumn now! But I would keep it, I think you'll enjoy looking back at all your options and it's nice to keep it all in one place. 

  • Not much to report this week, been getting to grips with new job and very long days. I’ve woken up today feeling utterly rotten, sore throat and really snotty, the house is a tip and the washing pile is out of contro, so I don’t think there will be much wedding related activity this weekend. 

    We have our appointment at the fertility clinic on Monday. I’ve been doing a really strict diet the last 10 days or so in an attempt to show willing and managed to lose 6lbs, that’s a stone since last appointmen, though Im still ‘obese’ in terms of bmi so I suspect we’ll be sent away again. 

    Im looking at photographers. I‘ve been bookmarking one’s I come across (mostly from googling our venue + wedding photography because I just like seeing what people have done with our venue, but also googling cheap photography in Manchester/Cheshire) for weeks, so this morning we looked through the bookmark list and I deleted all the ones that weren’t calling to me for whatever reason, either I wasn’t mad on their photos or their pricing info was too hard to find, or in some cases the website was clunky and hard to navigate or littered with spelling mistakes. I realise those are not all photography reasons but I had to get a shortlist somehow! I’ve asked for quotes/availability from the remaining four. 

    I already have two quotes from photographers who have worked at our venue before as I contacted them earlier this week. 

    We originally ‘agreed‘ a budget of £750 for photography.

    1) Leonardo Studios - This guy has photographed our venue before, which is not an essential criteria or anything but is how I found him. The photos from that wedding don’t wow me overall, but there are some nice ones in there and I like his portfolio in general. I’m not looking for groundbreaking photography or anything, just nice pictures we can share and look back on, and he seems more than capable. His communication has been prompt and professional yet friendly. He offered us a package way beyond our original budget, but includes videography and a photo booth. I really want a photo booth! I’m not too bothered about videography (the highlights reel I saw was pretty cheesy) but that could be changed to a second photographer. That package is £1300 but he has said he’d be willing to reduce a little if it helped us. There is a photography only package also, which is within our original budget. 

    This is his ‘featured wedding’ from our venue https://www.leonardo-studios.com/plough-inn-eaton-weddings

    2) ER Photography - I came across these guys as they have very recently worked at our venue. I saved that featured wedding page because it’s a recent one of our venue and has some good interior shots of the barn that I keep referring back to when I’m trying to imagine our decor and get ideas, also I love the bride’s lipstick and her bouquet! Anyway I ruled the photographers out because they were a ‘contact us for a price’ kind which I always think means you can’t afford it, but then I just kept coming back to how much I loved the pictures, and looking at the rest of the portfolio I adore those too. So I got the price which was like double our budget, but they were so lovely and said they were keen to work at our venue again, and because we were in Dec they would reduce the price to £1100. She also said that she totally understood if that was still too much, and if so to let her know and she’d ask around her contacts because she was bound to know someone who could fit our needs, which I thought was really nice. 

    <p
  • ER photography continued - 

    I showed R their site this morning and he can sort of see what I mean about the different quality of the photos and he said we could look at the budget again if it’s what I really wanted, I‘m tempted but also aware that if I stretch for everything like this we’ll end up with a wedding we can’t afford without going into debt, I can already see me pushing the budget on my dress for example, and my adult bridesmaid was going to wear a dress she already has but now there’s another adult bm and I’m already thinking how maybe I should ask someone else too .... 

    Anyway, here’s ER’s featured wedding at The Plough, I love it so much ....https://www.erphotography.co.uk/cheshire-wedding-photographer/the-plough-inn-at-eaton-wedding-photographer-chris-becky

    Of the two I prefer ER, but I really like the extras included with Leonardo for the same/similar price. 

    Any thoughts?

    The other quotes I’ve requested are all from people around our original budget according to their websites, so I’ll see what they come back with. 

    The only other bit of news of news is that MIL is already driving me a bit mad. We were there for dinner last night and she was already ordering me about a bit about we need to go to this wedding fair in Jan (her friend runs wedding fairs as a job, but to be honest I’ve no interest in them. The one we briefly visited the other week - everything there was way over our budget and there was nothing I hadn’t seen or thought of already), the colours I want are wrong as December should be silver and white, I need to go to this place that does silk flowers with her despite me saying I don’t want silk flowers, and going on about these wicker hearts from the pound shop which fine, good idea, but I need to decide a few more fundamental things first before I know if I want wicker hearts or not. She’s fine, I just stuck to my guns and it will be fine but it had been a very long week and it was a conversation I could have done without. 

    I know silk flowers would be easier to set up beforehand as we won’t have access to the room till 6.30am on the day, but I would like real flowers on the tables and that’s that -my plan is to either use triangle nursery or just hit the supermarkets the day before, arrange the flowers in various bottles/jam jars - they’re just going to be super simple a few stems in each and then dotted along the middle of long oval tables with candles and some greenery. Am I being wilfully naive or is that doable? I don’t want ‘arrangements’ as such. 

    Oh and MIL has added about 10 people to the guest list. She’s happy to pay for them herself - although probably only 4 of them will come but she’d like to invite the others for forms sake. Which is fine in theory but the maximum capacity for the ceremony is 70 and we’re already at 60 plus 8 kids. Of the children maybe 3 could go on knees, but the rest are too big and would need their own seats. And we’ll be really screwed if those invited for form’s sake do decide to come! 

  • ConnyConny Posts: 3

    Thank you for sharing! It is never to early to start planning your wedding! How nice it would be to involve your dog at the wedding ceremony. Just an idea!! Conny.

  • Ozzy2bOzzy2b Posts: 143

    I think on photographer go with whose work you love. There are a few things it’s worth stretching for and (in my opinion) photography is one of them. These will be the lasting images of your day and it’s worth spending money on. There are always ways to cut your budget on details that no one else will care about but your photos will always be yours to look back on and they will be the bit that others want to see after the wedding 

  • Ozzy2b wrote (see post):

    I think on photographer go with whose work you love. There are a few things it’s worth stretching for and (in my opinion) photography is one of them. These will be the lasting images of your day and it’s worth spending money on. There are always ways to cut your budget on details that no one else will care about but your photos will always be yours to look back on and they will be the bit that others want to see after the wedding 

     

    Yes this is my way of thinking too. Another photographer I had my eye on, whose packages usually start at £1000 has offered us £800 for the full day. He’s very good, I do like his pictures and he’s been really helpful and informative over email, I’ve had 3 lengthy emails just this weekend full of ideas. 

    I REALLY love ER still though. Something about their pictures appeals more to me, I wish I knew more about photography so I could pinpoint exactly what! 

     

    In other news ive just booked us to see David Gray in March, that can be R’s Christmas present. If we do a first dance it will be to his ‘This Year’s Love’, we both love it and when drunk we have a tendency to put on the version he did on Later with Jools Holland and dance around the living room. I don’t know if we will bother with a first dance though, drunken YouTube parties aside we’re not good dancers, and I find it a bit cringey. What is everyone else doing? 

     

     

  • Hi! My friend was browsing our forum and let me know that you’d spotted our wedding on the ER photography blog! I just wanted to say that they are so worth it. The photos are amazing and they are such lovely people. Both husband and I aren’t keen on having our picture taken and they made us feel so comfortable in front of the camera, a lot of the time you don’t even realise they’re there. We were in a similar situation where they were a little over our budget but as we thought we’d be looking at these photo’s for the rest of our lives they’re one of the things worth spending the money on if you really love them. 

    if you want to know any more about the Plough or anything  let me know!

  • CavalierBride wrote (see post):

    We have our appointment at the fertility clinic on Monday. I’ve been doing a really strict diet the last 10 days or so in an attempt to show willing and managed to lose 6lbs, that’s a stone since last appointmen, though Im still ‘obese’ in terms of bmi so I suspect we’ll be sent away again. 

    It annoys me so much that things like this are linked to the very outdated method of the BMI chart. I'm a size 10/12 and run half marathons yet according to the BMI chart I'm still obese by several stone. It really angers me tbh, hope you have good news today xx

  • Hullass1972 wrote (see post):
    CavalierBride wrote (see post):

    We have our appointment at the fertility clinic on Monday. I’ve been doing a really strict diet the last 10 days or so in an attempt to show willing and managed to lose 6lbs, that’s a stone since last appointmen, though Im still ‘obese’ in terms of bmi so I suspect we’ll be sent away again. 

    It annoys me so much that things like this are linked to the very outdated method of the BMI chart. I'm a size 10/12 and run half marathons yet according to the BMI chart I'm still obese by several stone. It really angers me tbh, hope you have good news today xx

    I'm a personal trainer, teach and workout 5-6 days a week, am a size 8 (sometimes 6!) with a generous lower half and still am considered to be overweight by BMI standards. For me to be considered the healthy BMI size I'd have to get down a stone and I'm fairly certain I'd die if I did that 😄😄😄

     

    Hope you have good news! 

  • Sci-Fi Nerd wrote (see post):
    Hullass1972 wrote (see post):
    CavalierBride wrote (see post):

    We have our appointment at the fertility clinic on Monday. I’ve been doing a really strict diet the last 10 days or so in an attempt to show willing and managed to lose 6lbs, that’s a stone since last appointmen, though Im still ‘obese’ in terms of bmi so I suspect we’ll be sent away again. 

    It annoys me so much that things like this are linked to the very outdated method of the BMI chart. I'm a size 10/12 and run half marathons yet according to the BMI chart I'm still obese by several stone. It really angers me tbh, hope you have good news today xx

    I'm a personal trainer, teach and workout 5-6 days a week, am a size 8 (sometimes 6!) with a generous lower half and still am considered to be overweight by BMI standards. For me to be considered the healthy BMI size I'd have to get down a stone and I'm fairly certain I'd die if I did that 😄😄😄

     

    Hope you have good news! 

    Bloody ridiculous isn't it!!

  • Good luck for today!! Hope it all goes well x

  • Thanks guys! Well the appointment was fine, because my weight is down slightly and my last few cycles have been slightly more regular, the dr seemed to think I might be ovulating again. 

    Now to be straight - my weight/cycles haven’t changed THAT much and I’m pretty sure I was ovulating anyway, just very late in my cycle, but I feel like that was the narrative the doctor had for me so there we are. 

    So I had another progesterone level check blood test, and he thinks we should keep trying and go back in Feb to see where we are. If I am ovulating I’m not sure what he’s suggesting, if not then I get medication to boost ovulation then. And if that doesn’t work ivf. 

    Its all a bit wait a bit then wait a bit more really, which is frustrating but then again I’ve just started a new job and booked a wedding and Christmas is around the corner and I’m just going to focus on all that for a bit and worry about the fertility stuff later because to be honest after 2 pretty full on years I’m tired of thinking about fertility (or the lack thereof) and could use a break. 

  • Becky135 wrote (see post):

    Hi! My friend was browsing our forum and let me know that you’d spotted our wedding on the ER photography blog! I just wanted to say that they are so worth it. The photos are amazing and they are such lovely people. Both husband and I aren’t keen on having our picture taken and they made us feel so comfortable in front of the camera, a lot of the time you don’t even realise they’re there. We were in a similar situation where they were a little over our budget but as we thought we’d be looking at these photo’s for the rest of our lives they’re one of the things worth spending the money on if you really love them. 

    if you want to know any more about the Plough or anything  let me know!

     

    Thank you! I loved your pictures, it looked like an amazing day. Can I ask how you arranged setting up the room in the morning? Did you do it yourself of have a dresser? 

  • Loving your thread so far! I am also a teacher, and relate to the chaos of daily life and lack of holidays! I love your venue choices, and in terms of photography, I much prefer ER Photography. The photos are a bit more flattering, and look more carefully edited. I know that budget constraints mean that this may not be an option though, and the other one still looks quite nice.
  • Oooh hello fancy new forum! 

    Nothing to update really. I need to pull the trigger on a photographer - I’m still in love with ER photography, especially with Becky’s review a few posts back, but I’ve also found 2 cheaper options - not the Leonardo one but 2 where I love the photos say 80% as much as I love ER. Part of me really thinks it’s worth the extra, and the other is really determined to stick to a budget - the overall budget being something I/we can stomach is really important to me with this wedding, I really don’t want to start taking an ‘oh sod it what’s another few hundred quid’ approach to everything. 

    So yeah, I’m torn, and R has gone from being the voice of reason and strict budgets to ‘whatever you want babe’ surprisingly quickly. 

    I do hope I get a bit more decisive with other aspects of planning or the next 12 months are going to be quite painful! 

    Ive been playing around with the save the date idea - my writing isn’t the best and we’d need a nice backdrop but Fred looks cute (apart from his ears obscuring the actual date). I used a chalk marker rather than actual chalk and now I can’t rub it off! Going to give R the project of getting it off or if not I might have to paint over with blackboard paint or possibly buy a new sign (although they’re sold out on the works). 


  • If there are other photographers you like almost as much, I'd go for them. I feel like this isn't just a wedding for you, it's the start of a family and given you're planning on having kids as soon as possible you might regret going over budget. 
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