Our Afternoon Tea Wedding Report.

I have enjoyed, and been inspired by, so many of the reports on here - picking up tips, getting advice, 'talking through' ideas, and have loved following brides through their planning phase through to seeing pictures of their wedding day.  So, I hope that this short report, its pictures and my recollections of a very happy day - which didn't always go completely as planned! - will be useful and of interest to some of you.

As seems traditional - or usual, anyway! - for these reports, I am going to start with a 'sneak peak' with one or two photos from the day!

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  • MrsPar13MrsPar13 Posts: 821
    Ah you look gorgeous and so happy. Congratulations x x
  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    How we met


    I think I outlined how we met at the start of my planning report.  We had both been in long marriages that hadn't worked, and both of us had taken the difficult and corageous step to end them.  At the time we met I wasn't looking for a relationship, but fate had other plans.  Someone from work - I think! - signed me up to matchdotcom, although they didn't pay the fee so no photo of me was showing on the site.  Steve had joined match a month or so before, and saw my new profile, and, annoyed by the lack of photo, decided to contact me and ask why I didn't have my photo up.  He didn't know where I lived (over three hundred miles away) or that my lack of photo was due to the fact i didn't know I was on the site!

    He messaged me with his email address in the subject, and I was intruiged as to how he had got my details ... so, going against my better judgement, going against my reservations about dating websites and against my determination not to enter a new relationship, I sent him a message back.

    After a couple of messages, it was clear to him that I was not interested in a long-distance relationship (or any relationship, really!) and he did not want a relationship with a teacher (his ex wife was a teacher, and he didn't like being limited to taking holidays during school holiday time!)

    So it wasn't an auspicious start!

    But I liked the friendly tone of his messages and he did make me smile at a time when I thought there wasn't much to smile about, and he thought I was a good 'listener', so asked if I minded, as he was new to 'dating', if he 'practised his typing' on me.

    Not very romantic, but I found myself looking for his emails (we swapped addresses) during lunch times, and typing replies as soon as I got in from work.  After a few weeks, we were sending each other about 40 (sometimes short!) emails a day.

    And I still hadn't sent him a photo......

     

     

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    Thank you Mrs Par2b, we had a lovely, happy day image

  • TickleyJessTickleyJess Posts: 1,649
    Yay!!! I'm excited about reading this image x
  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    I avoided sending a picture for quite a while, but in the end decided to do so.  After the initial 'send-me-a-photo-soon' messages, Steve realised that for various reasons I had huge hang-ups about the way I looked and din't pester me for a picture, which was great - I had time to get to know him through emails and texts which gave me confidence to eventually send him a picture - I fully expected him not to reply again though!

    I waited anxiously but not for long .... he sent back an email straight away, with just three words

    'wow, you're gorgeous!'

    I was so relieved!

    After a couple more weeks, while I was away for a day or so, he texted me and said 'Can I ring you?'.  Although I had been expecting to speak to him, looking forward to it even, it felt like this would be a big next step.  But I texted back 'yes, of course!' and we talked for two and a half hours until suddenly and without warning my phone ran out of battery - and, dammit, I had left my charger back at home!  I was worried he would think I had cut him off!

    Luckily he had assumed battery life was the problem, and we resumed long conversations over the following days - I rang him when my youngest - who was about 14 - went to bed around 9.30pm.  We were both exhausted over the next days and weeks, as we talked until midnight or later, and then he would be my 'alarm clock' in the morning, calling me at 6.30am to tell me to get myself into the shower and off to work!

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    Thanks TicklyJess - I am hoping you are going to start your report very soon! image

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    And then of course, one evening, the phone call ended with a question - 'do you think we should meet up?'

     

  • DrBridezillaDrBridezilla Posts: 1,018
    Oooo so excited to read your report xx
  • MrsMcG2beMrsMcG2be Posts: 402
    You look absolutely beautiful! Can't wait to read more x
  • MRS LILLERSMRS LILLERS Posts: 1,319

    YAY! Glad this is up. Great story so far image xx

  • nats2013nats2013 Posts: 6,253
    yay! more more more!!!!
  • Hooraaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!! Huge congratulations MrsThirdthing!!!!!!!! image image image image image

    You looked absolutely stunning and Steve looked handsome image. Also, I LOVE your bouquet and Steve's buttonhole, they look so beautiful image. WRITE FASTER!!!! image xxx

  • So glad you're writing a report! Loving this. image

  • LittleRed_10LittleRed_10 Posts: 1,453

    You look beautiful and yaaay report!

  • nenjennenjen Posts: 1,524

    Thirdthing you look so beautiful! Your little wrap looks fab with your dress too image I'm really looking forward to seeing more pictures xx

  • SilvereyeSilvereye Posts: 288

    Wow, you look stunning!! I love your dress...and your hair! Write more please....and more photos!

    Oh...and CONGRATULATIONS!! image

  • BuddletBuddlet Posts: 1,289

    What a beautiful elegant bride image cant wait to hear more! xx

  • DreambrideDreambride Posts: 394

    You look radiant Thirdthing, beautiful dress - plesae don't leave us hanging - more pls image xx

  • MrsJCMrsJC Posts: 2,204

    I'm going to enjoy thisimage

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    Thank you for all your encouragement!  

    so, to continue -

    It sounds silly to say that i hadn't thought as far ahead as actually meeting up!  So when he suggested it, I felt simultaneously excited, nervous, surprised and daunted.  

    I suppose I felt scared that it had all gone so well by email, text, and phoning, that if we met in person it wouldn't be as magical or 'right' as it was 'virtually'.

    I think he sensed my worry through the ether, and hurriedly changed the subject, but it hung in the air that evening and for the next few evenings.

    But the subject was raised again, of course, and we realised that if the relationship was to go any further than of course we would need to meet!  It was just that while we were getting on so well in this virtual world, we didn't want the spell to be broken.  

    But a date was set, and the countdown started!

  • SP2013SP2013 Posts: 857

    Love love love this! xx

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    We met up on a very snowy wintry north-eastern afternoon, and, because of our shared interest in architecture, I took him on a tour of The Sage Gateshead, The Baltic, Grey Street, Grainger town.

    I was totally charmed - I had to pick up a gift for a friend from John Lewis, and it was no trouble for him to help me with my errands, he carried bags for me (Christmas was looming and I had a lot of shopping to do!) He opened doors for me, was incredibly attentive, stopped to listen to carol singers with me, patiently waited while I dithered over trinkets, and we talked and talked and talked.

    And then, leaning over the balcony in the Sage, listening to some Christmas singers, he held my face in his hands and kissed me.

    I think we both knew it was going to be serious.

  • MrsB2B:)MrsB2B:) Posts: 244
    Oh wow you look stunning!! You look soo happy and your hair is gorgeous! Congratulations! Need to read more!! Xx
  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    He met my children on Christmas Day - a long story really, but essentially he had been up in the Lake District, fallen down a hole in the dark on Christmas Day afternoon, the local hospital was closed, and he thought his ankle or foot was broken and so he drove across to Newcastle for me to take him to the hospital!

    Upon hobbling in, he met my younger two and then we went to the hospital A and E - waitied 4 hours, nothing broken, which was great, but what were we going to do about him coming home with me at 4 in the morning?

    In the end, we slept in our clothes, on top of the covers, with the bedroom door propped open, so that the children would know that nothing 'improper' had happened when they went past the bedroom in the morning!

    My eldest son was working abroad, but the other two took to Steve immediately and we planned a eurocamp holiday with them in April - it felt like we were already a family.  It was a very emotional holiday for us all.

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     This is us on the holiday, about 4 months after we met.

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    The proposal

    We actually talked about getting married pretty early on - we knew we wanted to be together, but more than that we wanted to get married.  Unfortunately Steve's work is in London and mine is in the north-east, and even now we are married we don't live together full time.  

    Although our official proposal day was Christmas Day in 2011, we had been looking at rings for quite some time.  I knew I wanted platinum as my first wedding rings had been gold, and Steve wasn't keen on solitaires.  He wanted me to feel special and he enjoyed the engagement ring hunt as much as I did - we looked in lots of second hand and vintage jewellry shops, and even planned a trip to Tiffanys - and we were on the way there when we spotted this.

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     Steve persuaded me to try it on - it wasn't exactly what I had been after, I wanted something round or square, but, hey, It would be rude not to, right?!

    The lady in the shop brought it out of its glass case and -wow! - it fitted!  That was the romantic-oh-it's-meant-to-be, moment, and then when the manager said it was in the sale, and that he'd reduce it a tad more, and interest free credit was avaialble, Steve's practical side kicked in and he said he thought it was The One!

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

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     The matching wedding ring didn't match perfectly, and anyway, I had always said I wanted a plain narrow wedding band.  But trying on a plain one, neither of us felt it was 'right'.  The diamond eternity in the shop was far over our budget though.  So I set to work resourcing a cheaper wedding ring, and I found one on Blue Nile, from where we nearly bought our engagement ring.

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  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    Well they say the best laid plans often go astray and ours certainly did.

    We knew our budget was going to be low, but started looking at potential venues in the north - east .... we really enjoyed going to wedding fairs all over the region, and were on the verge of booking when, very sadly, Steve's lovely step-dad had a major stroke, leaving him virtually completely paralysed and unable to travel.

    So, even though we have many friends in the north, we decided that, in order to have Steve's mum and step-dad with us, we would have to move our plans more than 300 miles south and have our wedding in West Sussex.

     

  • Thirdthing, I am sat here in tears reading this. Nobody deserves a happy ending more than you do and I am genuinely over the moon that you and Steve found each other. I hope with all of my heart that you both have an amazingly happy rest of forever togther. Huge congratulations and lots of hugs to you both again xxx

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    Although it was going to be a second marriage for both of us, we considered marrying in church, but walking back from the parish office where I had gone to pick up an information pack, I walked right by the front of the register office, located a few minutes walk away from Steve's mum's house.

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     Steve and I both love brickwork and all the different bonds, and I loved the muted colours in the brickwork.  I decided to have a little look around the back -

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     I htought it was lovely and possibly perfect for our day.  Back around the front , the door was open, so I rang the bell and asked to look inside ...

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     I loved the pale pistachio/duck egg colours and the feel of the room.  I was getting pretty excited!

  • Thirdthing2Thirdthing2 Posts: 1,288

    Thank you Fox xxx I don't think I am the onlyh one who deserves to be happy though x

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